Saturday, June 27, 2009

Why do MEN cheat?

Why do men cheat?

I'm not asking that questions to say that only men cheat. We all know that some women cheat too. Nor am I saying that all men cheat. I'm simply asking the question because a friend of mine couldn't seem to understand why a man that really loved his wife/ girlfriend could cheat on her.
It happens. I told her that all men don't do that, though. There are some guys that really make the right decisions when it comes to being faithful and good. I have been both unfaithful and faithful in certain relationships. As a matter of fact, I was the cause of the end of the best relationship I've ever been a part of due to me being unfaithful. I will always regret the decisions I made in that situation.

Back to what I was trying to explain to my friend. I was telling her that it's a deeper problem than simply a man cheating on a female he cares about. Most of the time the girlfriend or wife has nothing to do with a man cheating. Most of the time a man simply does it to get something different or new. Don't get me wrong. Some men really want to be with someone else. That's why they may cheat. But a lot of guys simply make the wrong decision when faced with the option of smashing something new and fine. It's a tough thing for some men, seriously. I once had a friend tell me that he couldn't be totally faithful until women stopped finding him attractive. I've always thought that comment was funny.
To really defend my guys I usually go back to the way a lot of us guys were raised, and some of the things we were told by our family members, friends and others when we told them about really falling for a girlfriend or whatever. I always used to hear, "Boy you're too young. You have your whole life ahead of you. Boy, you better not think you're in love because you'll see so many other fine girls when you go to college.You're too young to think about marriage. "
Those are simply some of the things I heard. Most of us guys were taught to always enjoy what we're doing, but keep our eyes open for something better. Maybe that's also why some guys have problems committing. We always think something better may be out there.

What do you think? I'm simply babbling through this blog. I can only speak about the things I know. Ya know? OK...I'm back to talking about sports. LOL.


  1. Mmmm why do men cheat? I like this topic! I have been on both sides of the fense as well, I have been in relationships where I was unfaithful, as well as those where I was faithful. I have also been in relationships where I was the one being cheated on.

    The one I can speak the most true on, is why I cheated. First off, I would like to say that to start my relationships, I let the person know what they are getting themselves into. I consider myself young, and not ready to be totally committed. If the person agrees, then the relationship starts with clear minds. If they do not, then we keep it moving separately with no hurt feelings. I feel this is key to every relationship, because though you both care for one another, your mindsets may not be on the same track. Now, during the relationship, I tell the person before I cheat, that I am about to cheat. Is this a tough cookie to swallow? Yes! But is this keep all chips on the table? Yes! Does this make the action of cheating better? No! I'm young, I've made mistakes, but I make them consciously. Cheating is not an accident, theres always a reason behind cheating. I am in the process of growing up and trying to become a better person just like everyone else.

    Now, to me, there are 2 main reasons on why a person cheats. The first reason is my personal reason, I was young (still young), I haven't completely finished exploring these unknown grounds. I feel this is the basic problem behind unsuccessful marriages. Too many couples go based off love to get married without realizing they are not mentally ready. Then once married, they begin to see all the unexplored lands they missed out on. The second reason is change. In a relationship, one may not do the things they use to do that kept things exciting or kept the smile on the other's face. This does not make matters better to cheat, but one loses sight of what they had because it is not as bold as it was when they first got into the relationship.

    Now, I feel the main thing to prevent all this from occuring is communication. This is key to all successful relationships. To prevent the first reason, all one must do is talk to they special one. Tell them where they stand mentally. You may find that the other is in the same state of mind. You can come to an understanding and agreement on how to work out the relationship before getting too serious. To prevent the second reason, it is the same concept. Talk to the other when things start seeming too mellow. If it seems the other is losing you emotionally or you losing them emotionally, then talk. Come up with new ways to keep the relationship hot. These conversations shouldn't be considered taboo because you are simply speaking what's on your mind and what it seems is on theirs. Humans weren't made to read each other's minds. And if all else fails, maybe the relationship wasn't meant to last. Never force what is not there or else that will increase the chances of cheating.

    Well, I'm guessing I've said too much, lol, just wanted to put my 2cents in! I love this topic anthony, as you can see.

  2. You did say a lot. LOL. But I appreciate you sharing. No doubt.

  3. why do men cheat? first of all i concedarn my self still young,but because of my experience as a girlfriend,mom and wife i more matured than my age.

    men always be a men.there are three things,why men cheat?

    AGE***being young with the relationship is work
    for a while untill they find out,young
    men can have more woman & able to select
    because young men they're mind is not set
    as being a grown man.

    EXPERIENCE***men that have more experience when
    they were young!when it come the serious
    relationship,believe them 99.9% tell the
    true,you know why?they been & than that.

    WOMAN***is there woman ask why men cheat with
    them? sometimes,woman did'nt realize
    it could be woman fault,man expect some
    things from woman a real job (LOL)woman
    need to look up!its woman has something
    to do why men cheat...

    this comment is so far in my experience and realizeng that it could be men or woman why this person cheat.i spoke this only for my self not for everybody we know that we have defferent openion. muahhhhh LOVE my man..